Forty Swings of the Sword
by zealousfreak27
Summary: A Berserk Fanfiction, written in forty Ficlets. Rated T.


**AN/ Spoilers. Lots of them. **

**It's rated T for language and mild adult themes. Enjoy. **

Forty Swings of the Sword

1) Human

"What do you think about all this?"

Schierke looked up at her fairy guardian, unsure of what she meant. "What do I think of… what?"

"You know," Evarella gestured at the bustling city of Vritanis, "this place. The people and their stuff and… Everything! It's your first time out of the country, so what do you think?" Schierke frowned. She didn't really have an answer to that. The people here were mostly loud and rude. Their stuff was boring. The city was beautiful, but very dirty. She could have said all of these things to Evarella, but she didn't want to. The only thing she said in response was, "It's human."

2) Magic

Judeau sat down, exhausted. It had been a long day. He bit his lip to keep from moaning in pain.

"Hey, what's wrong?" asked a voice from above him.

"Huh, who's there?" he said, looking up. He saw a small creature above him, floating in midair. He was usually a calm person, but his eyes widened in surprise. "What _are _you?'

"Me? I'm a fairy. The name's Puck," said the creature.

"Fairy? I thought they were just legends. I mean, I've never seen one."

"Well you see one now! I'm going to be traveling with your circus for a while. But I came over here because I could tell you were in pain. What happened?" said the fairy.

"You could tell…" Judeau trailed off. Pulling his thoughts together, he said, "Nothing much. I cut myself. I do a knife throwing act. Someone threw a piece of fruit at me; messed up my balance."

"Let me see." Judeau shrugged and held his injured hand out gingerly. It was bandaged, but blood was beginning to seep through. Puck lighted upon his hand, and peeled the bandage back carefully. Turning around he gave a good shake to his wings. Judeau paid no attention to what he was doing, and studied the creature. He was amazed at its- or his- ethereal body.

"Well, it should be all better now!" said Puck. Judeau looked down at his hand in astonishment. There was no sign that there had even been a wound there. "Uhhhh… Thanks! Thank you very much, Puck."

"You're welcome!" said the fairy, smiling happily. "You must get injured a lot, huh. Oh, I know! I'll just get you a whole lot of the stuff. You know, my fairy dust is magic. I can save up and get a lot to give to you. Does that sound good?"

Judeau sat stunned for several moments. Then he spoke quickly, "Yes, I'd love that. Would you do that for me?"

"Of course!"

3) Blessed

Casca used to think of Guts as a curse.

It had seemed to her like God had sent this man into her life simply to ruin it. Sure, before her life hadn't been perfect, but she had been Griffith's second in command. She could be there for him, to help him. But when Guts came, that was all gone. Griffith relied on him so much more than he would ever have relied on her. And so, she had let her feelings boil within her. Guts was her curse, and she hated him.

But, as he swung his sword to protect her, Casca wondered if he was not a curse, but a blessing.

4) Farewell

He made sure to grab lots of food. If he was going to run away, it didn't mean he had to be hungry. If this was to be his last act as a member of this family, he may as well make it robbing them blind. He tried to be quiet as he slunk through his house. If you could call it a house… more like a hovel.

He stepped carefully around his brothers, all peacefully sleeping on the floor. He made it to the door and heaved a sigh of relief. He could feel no regret that he was leaving. He wouldn't miss any of them.

But when he opened the front door, he saw a figure heading towards him. His father. _"Shit." _He thought. _"I shoulda checked to make sure he was actually sleeping. He musta gone out to take a piss."_ He stood stock-still, like a frightened animal with nowhere to escape.

He held his breath as his father came closer and closer. His father didn't seem to see him; it was dark out. As soon as his father was just inside the door he took off running. This alerted the old man to his son's presence. He was running. Running away from everything he had ever know.

"Isidro, get back here, now!"

"Bye!"

5) Hunger

After a childhood of starvation, Serpico was adept at recognizing hunger. Even those with more than enough food could be hungry. His whole childhood he had been hungry for food, but also for just simple care. On a base level, everyone hungered for that.

But when Farnese had taken him with her to her home, he had wondered how someone with so much could be so unhappy. But he had realized that she hungered just as much as he had. She wanted approval and recognition, something she didn't often get from her parents. There was something else she wanted, but Serpico could never put his finger on it. All he knew is that it could never be satisfied.

Her needs came out in bizarre ways. Often, her whims ended with him being injured. Then nursed back to help. Then injured again. This cycle was repeated. Very often.

She was hungry, hungry for life, and he would find a way to satisfy her.

6) Catalog

The man they called Griffith came in the library often. Since he had been knighted, Nora often saw him sitting in a corner, reading. The books were usually what you'd expect from a leader of mercenaries. Books on strategy, politics, and war were his general choices. She frowned on this practice from most.

But Nora eventually came to have a respect for him. Unlike the maids, she was far too old to be taken by his looks. Not even his perfect manners impressed her duly. It was his second choice in literature. It seemed to her that, when he had free time, he would come to the library simply for pleasure. He never checked a book out, saying that it might get ruined in his care. But she often saw him, settled into a chair, reading a book of fairytales.

7) Tender

When Puck had first met Guts, he had thought that he must not possess any feelings at all. Of course as time went by, it did become apparent that the man had emotions; anger and bitterness. Only through telepathy or the occasional expression on the man's face did Puck ever get a hint of any other feeling.

But now as Guts rushed to save the woman from his past called Casca, Puck realized Guts had many more feelings than he had thought.

8) Linger

Sol squinted his eyes and looked at the land that stretched before him. After the stories that he had heard in the last town he had passed through, he was apprehensive about what might lie ahead of him.

The stories about the section of Midland he was about to pass through varied. One spoke of it raining blood from heaven. Some said that the land was cursed, and that whoever passed through it died. The only one of these stories that seemed to be actual fact was that a company of the Holy Iron Chain Knights had passed through that area. According to what was said, they had seen what could be almost considered a whole lake of blood and dead bodies.

From what Sol could see now, there was no lake of blood. But he was still hesitant to go forward. He could see more than one skeleton from where he stood. The most disturbing thing was that most of them seemed to be ripped in half. Also, he could see no sign of any animals. There were not even any birds circling in the sky.

"_Maybe it really is cursed…"_ he thought uneasily. Shaking his head, Sol decided to take the long way around.

9) Forward

Griffith would accomplish his dream. He didn't care what he had to do. HE DIDN'T CARE! He wished he could scream those words; scream them so loud that everyone would here. "_Here that, my followers? Do you hear, childhood friends? What about you, King of Midland? I will rule!"_

Even if he had to arrange it with God himself, Griffith would be king.

10) Snow

Guts pulled his cloak tighter around his shoulders. It was freezing. He squinted and tried to ignore the flecks of snow that flew in his good eye.

"Hey… W-wait up!" came a voice from behind him. Guts knew it was Puck. Why did the infuriating fairy follow him everywhere? Puck flew up beside him. "It's really c-cold," he said.

Guts knew that if the stupid little thing flitted around much more, he'd freeze to death. "Idiot. Why don't you wear clothes? You'll freeze."

"It's against my policy to wear clothes. T-they're, _confining _you know?" he said, shivering.

"Clothes could also be saving your life right now," Guts said, refusing to even look at the damn creature.

"N-never! I'd rather die than give up my c-conviction."

Guts sighed. Puck really would die pretty soon. "Ah, whatever."

After a few more miles of walking, Guts realized Puck wasn't behind him anymore. In fact, he hadn't been for a while. He considered leaving the idiot to his fate.

Ten minutes later, he found himself retracing his steps, looking for Puck. _"Why the hell am I doing this?" _he wondered. _"Well, there's no point in wasting a perfectly good first-aid kit," _he rationalized.

11) Paradise

Jerome kept his promise, and more. He was still not done with his service, but he actually sent Luca to his home ahead of him, along with a letter to tell those who worked for him to take good care of her. He made sure that the rest of the prostitutes had money enough to escape the situation they were in, and start a new life elsewhere.

Luca tried not to let her concern for the others mar her happiness. She had never had so much in her life. And how carefree she felt! She didn't have to worry about where her next meal would come from. She no longer had to sell her body to disgusting men, just to stay alive. And she hoped Jerome would come home soon, safe.

It turned out she could still find things to worry about….

12) Lull

Her whole life Jill had wished that something would happen to her. She wished that something drastic would happen, something that would change everything that was wrong in her life. Anything. Just let something happen to break the silent, dull repetition that life was.

But as elves- no, they were children- were slaughtered around her, she wished her life would be still again.

13) Crumble

No one in the Band of Hawk wanted to say it. They all held onto the now-shaken belief that everything would be okay. They had all felt conviction that once they had Griffith back, everything would go back to how it used to be. No one would say what they were all thinking.

"_Are we still the Band of Hawk?" "What are we supposed to do now?" "Why after all this time, after everything we've done, why this?"_

Without their leader, the Band of Hawks was crumbling.

14) Gone

She had idolized Griffith. From the moment that he had rescued her when she was still very young, she had looked up to him. As she grew older those feelings matured with her, and they developed into love.

And, as he took her body against her will, Casca was certain that the man she had loved was gone.

15) Empty

Whenever Guts thought that dying wouldn't be so bad, whenever he just gave up, it seemed like in those moments he fought the hardest. His mind shut off, all he had left was instinct. He would swing his sword, fighting for life even as he craved death.

Then his mind would fill with rage. Rage, rage that would destroy all else. He would swing and hack and obliterate everything. It felt like he'd never wake up. Maybe that was because he didn't want to awaken.

The Berserker armor only made this cycle worse. And Guts worried that he was losing himself. He was troubled because he enjoyed it all too much. In those moments of oblivion, he forgot everything. His pain, his suffering, his life. But he couldn't forget those things. They were what made him who he was.

Guts didn't want to lose himself.

16) Dark

Guts missed his Casca so much that it was tearing him apart. When the shell of what was once Casca looks his way, he almost always looks away quickly. Because it hurt him too much to see her eyes. Her dark, beautiful eyes.

Their appearance hadn't changed at all. They were still lovely, and still striking. But they no longer held their former magnificence. They no longer glowed with life and strength. In contrast, they were heartbreakingly dull. Guts despaired that he would never see them vibrant and shining again.

17) Contradict

Guts knew that Rickert could never hate Griffith. Guts wondered if Casca could hate him, if she ever woke up. He doubted it.

The feelings that Guts felt whenever he thought of Griffith were so complex, they were staggering. They were rivals; they were friends; they were enemies. Even the mention of Griffith's name brought a boiling pit of emotion into his stomach. In the end, there was only one feeling towards Griffith that mattered: Hatred.

18) Job

In his youth, Gaston had not known what he wanted to do when he grew up. When he was a teen his brother's shirt had been ruined in a street fight, and he had made him a new one. Ever since then he had longed to be a tailor. He had never had enough money to open up a shop, but in the back of his mind, the idea still lingered.

He loved being a mercenary. It was his life now. But he saved every coin he could spare, just in case.

19) Usage

"You can't possibly use that sword. You must just carry it around for show."

Guts looked lazily at the drunk who was looking at him condescendingly.

The words, "This guy's an idiot!" "I know!" came from a table adjacent to the table Guts was seated at in the inn they were staying at. Guts didn't even bother to look over, he knew who had spoken.

"Hey, I'm talkin' to you!" said the man. "I said, there is no way you can swing that sword!"

Guts just ignored him. Muttering, the man went on his way. Serpico walked up with food that he had purchased. "You could have proved him wrong, very quickly. Why did you not?"

Guts smiled crookedly. "There's no need to waste my sword on swine."

20) Family

Schierke came out of her cabin, yawning. It had been two weeks since Guts had beaten the supposed "sea god", and since then they had had no strange occurrences. It actually bothered her. There had been no assaults from monsters, no attacking pirates, and not even any strange magical incidences. She was enjoying the peace, as was everyone else, but it did seem strange…

Looking across the deck, she smiled when she saw Guts sleeping, looking comfortable in a chair. She heard cries of joy and saw Casca running about the deck. Farnese was looking on, a distance away.

But a frown flickered across Schierke's brow when she saw a small figure that was with Casca. It was the boy again. What was he doing here, and how did he keep showing up where ever they went?

The two, boy and woman, ran past where Guts was sleeping. He grunted and rolled over.

Schierke was struck by the resemblance between all of them. The boy really did look like he could be Casca's child, she had already decided that. But when she thought about it, he looked like Guts, too. They really could be…

Schierke turned red and abruptly left the deck.

21) Celebration

Another day. Another night. Another raid. Another party.

Some of the men started a drinking contest. They knew better than to challenge Guts, who seemed to never get drunk. Casca sat in a corner undisturbed. She shot occasional glances in the direction of Griffith. To anyone who often observed her, this would be seen as normal. What could be noticed as strange is that she also stole glances at Guts.

Judeau was making small talk to several of the raiders. He raised his eye brows at their accounts of Guts' leadership.

Guts himself was sitting next to Griffith. Neither of them was taking part in the festivities, both preferring to simply drink in the sight. They sat together in companionable silence all through the night.

22) Knight

_Just a princess, locked in her tower…_

Charlotte had loved fairytales when she was a child. Stories were the lovely princess was captured by the evil witch, and only her knight in shining armor could save her.

She had never imagined coming this close to living those stories. She had always been a princess, but now she was one who was locked in a tower, just like in so many of the legends.

All she could do was hope that her knight in shining armor would rescue her.

_Griffith._

23) Protect

He had always known Casca would never love him.

That was why Judeau never even let her have a glimpse of his feelings for her. He watched her from the shadows, protecting and loving her from a distance. He knew it was a hopeless cause, and that he should just move on. But somehow he couldn't.

That was why, as he was dying, he could feel no regret. He could have moved on with his life, but then how could he be here, assuring that Casca was safe?

He only wished he could protect her longer.

24) Sunrise

Guts was an early riser.

He would rise hours earlier than most of the men and train, or sometimes he would sit on the hill that allowed him to look down on the camp.

Judeau noticed this practice. On morning, he rose early as well. He found Guts sitting on the knoll. Guts said nothing when Judeau joined him.

Judeau proceeded to join Guts often. It wasn't every day, but many mornings the two of them could be seen, training or sitting, never saying a word.

25) Dream

This had to be a dream. It was not possible for the sky to turn red and for the sun to go in the middle of the day. Not to mention the giant faces that appeared everywhere. Corkus knew that this had to be a dream. And if he waited, he would wake up.

But as the monsters circled in around him, he wondered if it was not a dream, but a nightmare.

26) Journey

Puck had left Elfhelm a little over eight years ago. He had left because he was bored. And by god, he was definitely not bored anymore.

Most stories of heroic journeys featured a man, leaving poor, and coming home rich having gained many friends. Puck was not a man, and he wasn't rich, but he had gained some friends. And who needed heroic stereotypes anyway?

It had been one hell of a journey.

27) That

This One is frightened. That One hurt this one. That One has never hurt This One before.

That One is big, far bigger than This One. That One is always keeping This One with That One, and not letting This One do what This One pleases. That One placed This One's hands together, and now they will not separate.

Little One has returned, and This One is glad. This One thinks that Little One will stop That One from hurting This One again. This One hopes.

28) Responsible

Farnese was known by Isidro and Puck as Casca's 'babysitter'. It was meant to be degrading, but it gave her a sense of accountability, and a sense of belonging. Even if she was the least important part of the company, she was still a part.

The liability she felt was actually making her stronger. Caring for Casca was her duty, and she grew to enjoy it. There was also a feeling of dread. If she failed in her duty, not only would Casca be hurt, but she would be held responsible. She vaguely wondered if this was how Serpico felt all the time.

29) Fan

"Hey, Roderick! Have you ever heard of the thousand man slayer? You know, he was the captain of the Hawk's raiders, that old mercenary band. Do you know what his name was?"

The older man looked at Isidro. "I know of him, but I don't believe I remember his name. Sorry, kid."

Isidro walked away, looking dejected.

Guts sighed and scratched his head. Some day that kid was going to run into someone who remembered the name of the thousand man slayer. Guts did not look forward to that day.

30) Fire

Fire was an essential part of life. If you didn't have fire, how would you see at night? Of course, there are nights when moon is full and the stars are out. But there are nights when it is new and there are clouds covering the stars.

Fire is an excellent source of heat. Many a good man would be dead if he did not have flames to warm him on an icy night.

These things are all common knowledge.

But no matter how many good properties fire has, be it ten or one hundred, Serpico will always be repulsed by it. For he knows another fact about fire, one that he has experienced firsthand; Fire consumes.

31) This (AN: this one compliments #27)

This One likes Yellow One. Yellow One is kind to This One. Yellow One is This One's favorite.

Pointy One is good. This One likes the pretty lights Pointy One makes. Pointy One doesn't make them enough. There is also One That-Sits-On-Pointy-One.

Medium One is not always nice. But Medium One helped This One. This One doesn't forget.

This One doesn't know Sleepy One very well. But Sleepy One takes good care of Yellow One, so This One likes Sleepy One.

This One is glad to have all of the other Ones. This One doesn't see That One anymore.

32) Fashion

Isma had always preferred being naked.

The people on her island had always looked upon her lack of apparel. She only wore clothes if she had to go into their town. She didn't often need to. She didn't get cold easily, and she found that when she did, lying in the sun was the perfect remedy.

Being naked was just so comfortable. Besides, how are you supposed to swim while you're wearing a dress?

Luckily, Isma reflected later, the rest of her kind seemed to share her opinion.

33) Rumor

Rickert listened to rumors. He listened to any news at all that he could get of the Black Swordsman. Before he had come back to Rickert's home, asking about Casca, there had been only a few rumors. Then, he hadn't even known that the Black Swordsman was Guts. But he had heard stories, when he talked to strangers. Stories of a man with a huge sword, who evil followed like a dog.

After he had left again after finding Casca, rumors became even more rampant. Using the tales, he was actually able to piece together bits of what was really going on with Guts. He often told Erica what he supposed Guts was doing. He only hoped that Guts came back to them one day.

34) Peer

It was so obvious to Judeau what had changed between Casca and Guts. They didn't engage in over the top shows of affection, but he can see it all in the way that they look at each other.

When they would look at each other, they would just gaze at first. Then Guts would grin like maniac, and Casca would blush slightly.

Really, it was obvious.

35) Scratching

Sometimes, if Farnese could find no other way, she would use her nails to make herself bleed. Often she would find a knife or some other object to slice at her flesh with. But if she couldn't get to any of these objects, she would scratch at herself. She would run her sharp nails up and down her arms, until they were raw and bleeding.

Sometimes Serpico would notice. Once, he tried to stop her. Farnese slapped him and made him go away. She punished him later.

Her arms were usually red and painful for weeks. It hurt, and she relished the pain.

36) Size

Pippin had always been huge. He was a veritable giant of a man.

As a child, he frightened other children. Immediately pegged as the dangerous one, he was ostracized by his peers. He became a coal miner at age seventeen. Even among other burly coal miners, he was often avoided because of his monumental size.

As a mercenary, his size was not only useful, but it also made him content.

37) Know

Knowing things was hard. And Sonia had always known things. Being able to see the future was frightening. She still remembers "seeing" an image in her mind of both her parents dead. She had been terrified for days, not understanding what it meant. And then they did die. After that, all that she had felt was guilt. She should have understood, if she had, and had acted, her parents might have lived.

She was no longer afraid. Even her sadness was usually forgotten. Griffith seemed to have that affect on people. She was so calm now. All she had to do was surrender and let Griffith take over, and everything would be okay.

38) Shy

Charlotte hid behind a column. She didn't know any of the men that were standing around her father, and she didn't want to know them. Except maybe that man that Father was talking to…

With a start, Charlotte realized that they were talking about _her_. And now they were looking at her. She hid farther behind the column.

But then, Father called her over. What was she supposed to do?

She came over tentatively. The man who had been talking to Father smiled pleasantly. Father introduced him as Lord Griffith. She blushed painfully, but decided that he was very handsome.

39) Dispute

"Will you be quiet, you stupid monkey!"

"Maybe I won't!"

"I know that your brain is exceedingly small, but I would think that you would be able to wrap your head around the concept that I need quiet for this ceremony!"

"I'm _so _sorry about ruining your all important ceremony, but normal people make noise all the time. You would know about that- oh wait, you wouldn't. You're about the farthest thing from normal, you freak!"

"Now children, your master would like us to all get along and-"

"You stay out of this!" two voices said at the same time.

40) Seventh

The kiss ended, but Casca wished that it had lasted forever. Guts straightened and smiled at her. She smiled back and whispered, "That was the seventh."

Guts frowned. "The seventh what?"

Casca was startled out of her reverie. "Nothing, nothing." But she knew what she had meant. Their seventh kiss. Such a feminine thing to do, count their kisses. She was sure that Guts was making her weaker. But she didn't care. It didn't matter how weak she was, because Guts would always protect her.

**AN: Final word count: 4,742**

**It's over. The end. **


End file.
